Last Sunday morning, I woke up to the sounds of the Glee soundtrack, remixed, blasting out of the speakers residing in a nearby barn. I was shivering so violently I could have been forgiven for thinking I was having some kind of fit. As I came to, I realised I was surrounded by the canvas of a two-man tent, and as I turned to my left, I was affronted by the sleeping body of a half-dressed guy. The events of last night came flashing back. Shit, shit, shit. First reaction? Pretend to be asleep.
Somehow I actually did fall asleep, because next time I scanned my surroundings, the guy had vanished. I could hear people talking outside, I was aware I looked like shit and was still not entirely sober, and the last thing I wanted was to face them. I managed to escape and disappear for a walk in the 6am sunlight down the streets of...wherever the hell I was. As I walked I passed a man in his front garden, who, upon seeing me, decided he would stare at me incredulously until I left. Had he never seen a solitary teenage girl with ripped tights, matted hair and last night's vodka clutched to her chest at 6 in the morning? Apparently not.
Eventually, I made my way back to the party. To my surprise, I was not faced with the people I had spent the previous night with, but a large group of boys playing buckaroo with their sleeping friend and the help of some Vitafit orange juice cartons. Perplexed as to who the hell these people were, I joined them for an agonising half hour until I could get the hell out of there.
Now, we've all had those awkward morning afters, but it got me to thinking about all the good times that go with them. So, I decided to compile a list of 5 Top Parties. Hopefully I've included enough variety.
1. Afterprom: I'm not going to make any excuses, my prom was inexplicably awful. After an excruciating three hours of trying to enjoy ourselves but to no avail, me and my friends turned up at afterprom at midnight. The night began with my friend, completely sober, falling into the swimming pool. This, it has to be said, was a sign that the rest of the night was going to be hilarious. We were surrounded by acres of land, haystacks serving as seats, a massive marquee and a host of amazing DJs. Nothing could go wrong. And really, nothing did. There was a little drama involving a guy I was involved with at the time, but I was far too drunk to dwell on this and the rest of the night was spent dancing non-stop with people I only vaguely knew.
2. New Years Eve 09/10: Last New Years Eve, I managed to drag two of my friends to a party where none of us really knew anyone. Two guys from college had opened their flat to any party-goers around, and the night was spent dancing to all the classics that everybody loves, whether they admit it or not. 2010 was brought in with Rage Against The Machine - you simply cannot be happy when you're surrounded with people simultaneously shouting, "Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!" and then celebrated with my two friends by sitting in a shopping trolley and being spun around the concrete pavement repeatedly until we inevitably crashed to the ground, our heads cracking against the floor and our limbs scraped and bruised. My friend then accidentally burnt himself, and we proceeded to get lost in a field and endeavour on a garden-swapping challenge. These were all incrediby immature ideas that, in our drunken state, seemed like the best ideas in the world. And I hate to admit, were pretty fun.
3. Party In The Forest: Residing near to where we live, there's a forest with a clearing and a lake. Obviously, the first thing we will connect this with is...party venue. And so, one night in May, we all congregated, armed with tents, sleeping bags, a bong, weed, alcohol, portable barbeques, frozen food and ipod speakers. I should start this off by saying this wasn't the happiest night of my life, but at least it began and ended well. Putting up tents, singing along to the music, taking hits off the bong - it was all pretty chill. Later on, it was a different story. Pained by the events of the night, I had disappeared, tripping and armed with a sleeping bag, into the middle of the forest. I can't remember much that followed, but I did wake up in a tent, and the following day was one of those relaxed, living on the streets ones where everybody is content.
4. Tent Party: Actually, many parties are 'tent parties' but I was at a loss as to what else to call this. It was my friend's birthday and everyone turned up at her house for a night of debauchery. Nobody knew each other and everyone was sober, so the first hour was excruciatingly awkward, but it picked up after that when two guys arrived, armed with MDMA and a rig which they then proceeded to put in the tent. That was the first, and only, time I have seen a rig in a camping tent. It's funny how you can never see the time when a party goes from everyone hanging around talking to everyone off their faces and going wild. It sneaks up on you. Which is exactly what happened at this one. One minute, everyone was sitting around in the tent, drinking, taking hits off the bong and nibbling at mini milks (don't ask). The next, we were all was racing around the garden, swimming half naked in the pool, getting off with each other and stacking it against the rig. At about 4 in the morning, I was less drunk than I had been before, and me and two friends dragged a duvet out into a nearby field (you can tell I live in the country, eh?) and lay on it looking up at the stars. One of the two friends was high on MDMA and the next two hours were spent listening to his intoxicated ramblings with affectionate amusement.
5. Rocky Horror Picture Show Party This had to make the top 5 simply because we spent the night dressed like prostitutes. If that's not the sign of a good party, what is? The idea for the theme was brought on by a month of repeatedly watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show and learning the dance routine to Time Machine off by heart. We sent off the invitations, demanding everyone dress like characters from the film and knowing full well nobody would, whilst we set about creating costumes. I say costumes, really it was just underwear. Mine consisted of a pair of black boy shorts, red stockings, heels and a black corset, topped off with backcombed hair, smoky eyes and red lips. There is no other situation where you can get away with wearing that outfit (as I have since learnt. I joke, I joke). Near the date of the party, we had also watched Starter For 10, in which at one of their parties a bath is used to store the alcohol. In a flash of genius, we decided this was a great idea, and by some miracle, one of our friends had an abandoned bath tub in his back garden. Flash forward to 2am on the night of the party, and you have hoards of drunk people sitting in a bath full of ice. We had also filled a massive bowl with every form of alcohol in the vicinity, and passed it around along with a straw. It was filled with ash and fag butts by the end of the night, but oh no, that didn't put us off. All in all, it was a good night simply because it was one hell of a laugh.
What would be your five top parties?
In the future I may post an entry describing my 'Top 5 Worst Parties', as I can assure you there is some hilarious material there.
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